Cancel your guilt trip
Originally published in Balanced Life magazine
1. Having a small circle of friends
We’re all for being selective about who you share your life, thoughts and love with. As you get older, your priorities change and you discover exactly who you can – and can’t – rely on for real emotional support. Quality over quantity, always.
2. Saying no to social plans
Nobody wants to be the flaky friend, and we wouldn’t recommend making a habit of cancelling on your ride-or-dies. But if once in a while you’d rather recharge at home than hit that rooftop bar, give yourself a break. Take care of you first, and be a social butterfly another night.
3. Not having children
We think Jennifer Aniston said it best, in a blog post she penned for The Huffington Post last year titled ‘For The Record’. ‘We are complete with or without a mate, with or without a child. We don’t need to be married or mothers to be complete. We get to determine our own “happily ever after” for ourselves.’ When asked what prompted her to write the post, Jen said, ‘I just thought: I have worked too hard in this life and this career to be whittled down to a sad, childless human.’
4. Not replying immediately
There are plenty of studies and op eds that point to links between our too-connected lifestyle and raised stress levels. Unless it’s an emergency situation, the person on the other end of the text or email really can wait. There’s no need to feel like those blue ticks are glaring at you and tapping their watch.
5. Skipping a workout (once in a while)
Yes, consistency is the key to fitness results, but we’re not automatons. Every now and again you just don’t have enough oomph in you to make it to the gym. That’s okay. Use that time to be good to yourself in another way, whether that’s QT with loved ones or a long, hot bath.
6. Bingeing on series
Everything in moderation, including moderation, as the saying goes. TV today just keeps getting better, and there’s nothing wrong with curling up on a rainy Sunday to watch five back-to-back episodes of How To Get Away With Murder. As long as you’re not glued to the screen night after night, with exercise and social plans a distant memory, we can’t see the harm.
7. Being the boss lady
Having to come down on an employee who’s dropped the ball is never fun. Don’t compound the situation by sending yourself on an all-expenses-paid guilt trip too. Provided you aren’t passing the buck, that person needs to know what they did wrong and how to avoid it in future. You’re really only helping them and your business.
8. Declining a date
So he’s kind of sexy and he has his life together enough to be real bae material, but you’re just not feeling it? Politely decline and don’t let anyone – not you, not your friends and especially not him – make you feel bad about it. You are under no obligation either to find a mate or to spare this guy’s feelings by saying yes.
9. Not having it all figured out
10. Tipping less for bad service
Under SA labour law, restaurants are required to pay their servers a minimum wage, however It’s still considered pretty standard to tip between 10 and 15% for good service. That said, tipping is not an obligation and, in the case of poor service, you are within your rights to leave less.